sunnuntai 21. huhtikuuta 2013

Mama - A Cliched Ghost Story

There is no denying that Mama actually offers a couple of good scares. I mean the scenes where the girls are crawling in the dark are freaky to say the least. The PMSing demon ghost mama also makes some gruesome noises that had me cringing a few times. These elements were made famous a while back by Japanese horror flicks like The Ring and and The Grudge. It is nothing new, but I have to admit it still gets to me.

The acting is pretty half-assed. Jaime Lannister (real name Nikolaj something something) is evidently taking a short break from shooting Game of Thrones and we all sure wished he wouldn't have. His character could just as well have been killed off after the first 15 minutes and it wouldn't have made any difference to the plot. However, for some reason the writers decided to let him tag along and continue being absolutely useless through out the duration of the movie. Jessica Chastain looked pretty hot playing a sassy rocker chick turned step-mom, but the character in itself was pretty one dimensional and I could honestly not really give a rats ass if she lived or died. What about the children then? Meh. 90 % of  child actors suck at acting and these two girls definitely fall in that suckfest of a category.

The plot was your typical ghost-out-for-revenge -story, where the ghost is impossible to beat and you just have to wait until the very last 10 minutes to see whether or not someone comes up with a nifty plan for defeating the sorry bastard. Just once I wish that one of the victims would actually come back from the dead and hunt the actual ghost, but no, this is the movies and the rules clearly state that there can only be one ghost per movie. Mama came back from the dead, why can't her victims do the same? Oh and guess why Mama is acting out like this? When she he offed her self back in the day, she also killed her own child in the process. Now she's come back to look for her baby, who she herself killed mind you, and we are supposed to be ok with that. What a crummy excuse to justify her coming back! The viewer has to watch the ghost act like an asshole for two hours only to witness that in the end the ghost will just end up getting what it wanted. What a load of crock! Every ghost movie follows the same god damn plot e.g. Blair Witch Project, Paranormal Activity 1,  PA 2 , PA 3 , PA 4 (I really hate Paranormal Activity) etc. - ghost is a total asshole, everyone dies and ghost wins.

Hollywood can you please make it so that in the next ghost movie the ghost gets brutally ass raped in the end? I would pay to see that.

What can I say, Mama is a typical revenge story with a few good scares and a whole bunch of stupid white people with flashlights. Frack it, I'm watching Ghostbusters next!

I give this movie 5/10 Jaime Lannisters

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